& boundaries

I was told yesterday that my way of dealing with personal boundaries was much like that of a dog, that I just come up to them invade and lick their face, not literally of course, if that makes sense. I am very affectionate once I get to know someone, but I try not to be too overwhelming. But at times much like a dog, I run in full force, tail wagging, excited and full of energy and only then I back off when the other person backs away from me or if they seem uncomfortable.

I need to learn to be more aware of other people's personal space and how they react to my nature. I'm not like cats, cats have boundaries and are aware of them, and they are constantly enforcing them and reminding you of them, however the goalposts move for cats so you never really know what will be a boundary one day and acceptable the next, one day they run hot and the next day cold and will treat you with utter indifference and irrelevancy . I tend to just go in hot all the time and then adjust my behavior as needed, which is not always the best approach.

This was a really good analogy for me, and it put into perspective how I need to respect certain peoples boundaries more. Thank you for sharing that! I will always be asking if people are a dog or cat person from now on, I think it will be really helpful.

Recognizing and respecting personal boundaries has not always been easy for me, I grew up with an abusive parent where boundaries were not respected. As a result, I have learned to be very both sensitive to other people's personal space and how they react when I cross it and oblivious to boundaries that I should not be crossing. It has taken me a long time to learn how to read people and their body language, and even longer to put that knowledge into practice.

But over the years, I have come to realize that respecting personal boundaries is not only the right thing to do, but it is also the key to having healthy and fulfilling relationships. When I am able to respect someone's boundaries, they feel safe around me and more open to communicating with me. And when I am not respectful of someone's boundaries, they tend to pull away from me and we lose that connection.

So, to have better relationships I try to be very aware of other people's body language and how they are speaking to me. If someone seems uncomfortable or is backing away from me, and this may be real or just my feeling, I will at once stop and back off, but sometimes I need to be told without subtlety to back off, which I will do and respect.

It also means being conscious of other people's space and time, and not crossing those boundaries without permission. It means being aware of how my words or actions might affect someone else and adjusting my behavior accordingly. I tend forget how important boundaries are and sometimes I get lost in the flurry of information and am unable to decipher the subtle or not so subtle cues people give off. This causes problems for me because people then end up feeling like I don't care about them or their feelings, which is not the case at all. I simply need more practice in reading people and fully understanding their boundaries.

Respecting personal boundaries is important to me because it allows me to have healthy and meaningful relationships with others. It shows that I respect and value someone else for who they are as a person, and not just for what they can do for me. It also allows me to be more aware of my own needs and limits, and to set boundaries of my own.

When I violate someone's boundaries, it’s like a breach of trust, and it makes future interactions difficult because that person may be hesitant to let me get close again. By respecting personal boundaries, I can build better relationships with the people around me, ones based on mutual trust and respect. One way that I have found to be helpful in recognizing personal boundaries is to simply ask the person what their boundaries are. This can be a little bit difficult, especially if you don't know the person all that well, but it can be very informative. You might be surprised at what people consider to be proper or not proper behavior. By asking, you are showing that you respect the other person and their boundaries and that you want to make sure that both of you are comfortable with the interaction.

I have also found it helpful to set personal boundaries for myself. I am very guarded with new people, and this can be tricky, as I don't want to seem unapproachable or that I don't want to interact with others. But by setting boundaries, I am showing myself that I respect my own needs and limits. This helps me in interactions with others, as they will know that there are some things that I am not comfortable with and will respect those boundaries. It also helps me to better understand others needs and limits and help me to communicate my needs to others.

It is important to respect other people's boundaries because it allows us to create healthy and meaningful relationships with others. So, try to be aware of how your words or actions might affect someone else, and adjust your behavior accordingly. This means being conscious of other people's space and time, and not crossing those boundaries without permission. It also means listening carefully to what someone is saying, both verbally and nonverbally, to understand their needs and preferences.

Do I always remember to follow this set of rules? No, I don't think anyone does. But I am constantly trying to be more aware of boundaries, both my own and others, and to show respect for those boundaries.