listen, don’t hear

I don’t just hear you, Now I’m listening

I can talk, I am comfortable public speaking, and can talk a lot and rarely at a loss for words. I need to talk less and listen more because my issue is my inability to hear people, or more so listen to what they are saying and fully understand them and their intent. I will nod and smile, but not hear anything other than what will fit into my imagined narrative. This has caused me to miss important information or not be able to fully understand a conversation. I need to focus on the person speaking, instead of trying to think of what I am going to say next.

I tend to hear what I want to hear because of the fuzzy gauzed lens of my desires, judgments, and preconceived notions. I need to clean that lens and listen with fresh ears, an open mind, and heart so that I can understand the person speaking for who they are, not for who I want them to be.

Listening intently means that not only am I paying attention to the words that are being spoken, but also the tone, volume, and energy of the person speaking. It means that I am making a conscious effort to understand their entire message, not just the bits and pieces that fit into my worldview. I'm working on it, but it's a process.

When I truly listen to someone, I am committing to fully understanding them, even if I don’t agree with them. I am giving them my undivided attention and showing them that I respect their opinion enough to hear them out. It takes practice, but the rewards are worth it.

Truly listening to someone is one of the most important things I can do for myself and others. When I am actually listening, I am opening up my heart and mind to understand another person on a deeper level. I am showing that I care about what they have to say and that I want to build a connection with them.

Listening is also a powerful way to communicate my feelings and thoughts. When I take the time to listen to someone else, they feel heard and understood, which builds trust and strengthens the connection between us. I can then use that connection as a foundation to share my own experiences and feelings, knowing that I will be listened to.

I need to be able to listen better to others because it allows me to better understand them and their point of view. It also helps me build better relationships with the people around me. Listening is an essential skill that everyone should improve.

So how can you become a better listener? The first step is to be aware of your listening habits. Are you always thinking about what you're going to say next, or are you zoning out? Are you only listening to respond, or are you truly trying to understand the other person's point of view? Once you are aware of your listening habits, you can change them.

Here are some tips for becoming a better listener:

1. Be present. When you're talking to someone, make sure you're focused on them and not on anything else. Put away your phone, turn off the TV, and make eye contact.

2. Listen with your ears and your heart. Pay attention to what the other person is saying, not just to the words they are using. Try to understand their point of view and what they are feeling.

3. Don't interrupt. Let the other person finish talking before you respond.

4. Paraphrase what the other person has said. This will help you make sure you understood them correctly.

5. Avoid judgmental comments. Don't judge or criticize the other person's point of view. Just listen and try to understand it.

6. Ask questions if you don't understand something. If there is something you don't understand, ask the other person to explain it.

7. Be patient. Listening takes time and practice. It's not something that you can do overnight.

8. Show interest in what the other person has to say. Let them know that you are interested in what they have to say by nodding, making eye contact, and asking questions.

9. Be respectful. Always treat the other person with respect, even if you don't agree with them.

10. Practice, practice, practice! The more you listen, the better you will become at it.

When I take the time to listen to someone, I are opening up our hearts and minds to them. I am building a connection with them that can be used to share our own experiences and feelings. To improve your listening skills be aware of your tendency to focus on yourself and try to make a conscious effort to focus on the other person. Pay attention to their body language and facial expressions and try to understand what they are saying instead of just hearing it.

Another way to improve your listening skills is by practicing active listening. Active listening involves paying attention to the other person, repeating back what you heard them say, and asking questions to clarify. This not only allows you to better understand the other person, but it also shows that you are interested in what they have to say.

Lastly, remember that everyone can improve their listening skills. It takes practice and effort, but the payoff is worth it. When you become a better listener, you will develop better relationships with the people around you. You will also gain a better understanding of their point of view, which can be valuable in discussions and negotiations.

So, talk less and listen more and see the difference it makes in your life.